SAD, not depressed

It’s true. I think I’m feeling SAD, seasonal affective disorder. Not to be confused with feeling depressed. What’s bugging me most is not having any available daylight after work, which makes me resentful of my job and then grumpy at home.

It’s become really challenging to set out for a run at night, no matter how quickly I get home to suit up and put on the sneaks. By the time I hit the pavement it’s dark dark dark. There is no escape. Blah.

Now I don’t mind the cold and I’m fine with some gloomy wet skies, but I’ve realized that the Mon-Fri 8:30-5 gig prevents me from enjoying any sunlight after the workday during the winter season. Getting out for some exercise – training for a half-marathon? – is important to me and during the fall I was particularly diligent about beating the streets right after work. In fact I really looked forward to it. There’s a great trail which hugs some farmland that I enjoy running, especially when there was an hour of low warm sunlight to illuminate the landscape. The sunsets were spectacular. But in the dark that trail isn’t so accessible, especially after a rain, which means it’s only good for weekend runs.

What is to be done?

Well three things, only two of which are viable.

#1) I need to get up butt-ass early and begin the dreaded morning routine. I’m not happy about this but it’s the only way to see any daylight during the work week. That’s the simple, sad truth.

#2) Renew my quarterly membership at the ARC, the campus gym. I did it before, I can do it again. At least there are bright lights and lots of machines to use. Plus, they have squash courts which means I can play a few rounds with Mr. Megalomania here. (but he’s probably to busy at the moment)

#3) Quit my job. Yes! While my inclination is to choose this option, I know a few people who would think otherwise. So I’m left with 1 and 2.

Again, I’m not depressed or upset with the world. I’m not angry or Grinchy or Scroogey. I just want some daylight. Is that so much to ask? And I’m not talking about the bright, intense hot hot heat that hammers down on us in the summer. God no. I’m talking about a couple hours of dimly lit ambiance so I can get in a run without wearing my crossing guard vest and blinking light.

Why they scheduled this Davis Stampede the first Saturday of February is beyond me. Were they hoping to capitalize on everyone’s New Year’s resolutions? Or torture us poor souls who want to indulge during the holiday season?

Either way I am determined to do what needs to be done even if it means a shift in schedules. Sound the alarm clock. It’s time to wake up and feel the burn, baby.

End rant. Begin run.

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